I didn't shave. On purpose
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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