im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize