Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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