I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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