Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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