glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
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