Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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