it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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