You really coming over, don't trick.
In America we eat man semen.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
