Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize