can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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