It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
