Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
