don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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