your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
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