gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize