Sponge bath it is.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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