I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
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You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
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You pole danced in your parka.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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