my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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