My brain says no but my pants say off.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
