But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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