i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
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