i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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