Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.