You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?