"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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