im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.