i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
