a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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