You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
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the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
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Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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