That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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