She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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