Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
