Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
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she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
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I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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