Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
