Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Never joke about your clitoris.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
