first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
no, he came in my armpit
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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