Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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