That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize