She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
