I'm jealous of your bromance
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
