Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
It's blow job season.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
