you guys were way drunker than both of me
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
