I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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