i jhust puked up my retainher.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
