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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  she fell through a window trying to flash someone

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?

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