that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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