i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
