Walk of Shame. In a state park.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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