You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
