drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
