Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
